That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
