his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize