i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
You can't just leave with hair like that
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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