No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
