Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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