Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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