Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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