Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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