I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
