Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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