i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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