I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
