drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Terrible idea I love it
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
