if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Princesses don't give blow jobs
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
you had me at cake vodka
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm sobbing to NWA
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
