Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
