why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
