So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize