you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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