is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
