True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize