I skipped work to stalk him.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
