she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize