wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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