if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
