Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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