Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
