C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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