That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
