it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
