ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
this just has baby written all over it
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
