you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize