if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?