Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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