if you like me you must not know who I am
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
