Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
