Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
