I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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