I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
