dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
