You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
