Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize
