Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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