Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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