Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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