5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
