Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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