Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
