i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
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