so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
