oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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