your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
